whats the best way to make good and valuable friends online?

i have a very bad fear of socializing, and that fear has spread to my online interactions in the past year or so.by "good and valuable" i just mean friends who will include me, like me, and accept me. i know i should try branching out into spaces about my interests and stuff which i try to do but fail to stay consistent with it. it was definitely easier for me online in 2023, i think im declining socially day by day. any advice would help, whether it be about forming friendships or staying consistent with things. thanks /r/

So how good are you at actually socializing online? If you're playing a multiplayer game with voice chat do you talk casually at all, just call outs (enemy left, etc.), or stay silent. Give us something to gauge you on. Otherwise hobbies are the default way to make friends. Find place that discusses x subject and talk about that subject. I forget how to link to threads in other gens so here's a link to the "let's make friends on lainchan" thread. https://lainchan.org/hum/res/91126.html Does anyone have the greentext of anon learning how to speak confidently by just harassing scam callers? The summary of it was anon was a pushover who couldn't hold a conversation and just kept harassing scam callers because the rules they followed were they couldn't hang up unless you were angry learning how to hold a conversation and deal with people trying to pry something out of him. I remember the story ended with him being able to talk normally in society and hold himself with confidence. So if you're bored try that option.

I have not been able to connect with anyone since 2018 from becoming more uncomfortable with giving out personal information in public while simultaneously not wanting to use Discord.

>>48631 I'm in a similar situation and maybe you should look into materials on hoarding (lite) and CPTSD, and how people who hoard are helped. If you're also like me in starting a bunch of little things but they kinda pile and catch dust. Today I heard a phrase like, pick one of those projects or messes and begin slowly closing the loop on it, bring it to a gentle conclusion so you're not stuck with as much drag (like bad aerodynamics). Friends I can talk much about but "noble friendships" has been a high bar and yet I'm not sorry for keeping an eye on it. I didn't make new friends (that lasted) in a while but I got to know some people, some friendly, some not friend material upon closer inspection bc there's only so much dysfunction, grubbiness and risk I'm willing to take on at a time, and if I get exhausted I'm out for maintenance indefinitely so then I clear my calendar for real fwen only. Sometimes address book also. >>48632 idk the story but an acquaintance I used to be closer with was very happy with his callcenter job experiences, he said he learned a lot about how to be social and make bantz (bantz were practically a hobby for him). >>48633 I had fun on Discord this year, but ultimately I felt the groups I was in were a bit too chaotic and unboundaried so I deleted my account. Maybe I'll make a new one when I feel like making burners for the new account. I'd like to have my own website so people can contact me but on my terms, and hobbies I enjoy (more) alone and I'm willing to occasionally go outside and contact sunlight to achieve that. I think I have some kind of anxiety traumato symptoms so healing would be nice too.

>>48634 Me not using Discord is a mix of privacy concern how they are moderated and due to me not doing well in fast group chats. It means I cant even have a one on one conversation which to me is best way to get close to someone.

most of my valuable friends come from games ive played online, i just meet ppl and we exchange contacts and boom, yearlong friends, its rare sure but once you do get some they are there with an garantueed bonus of liking the same cause, obviously