How do normies do it?

Can't figure for the love of me how do you even make friends IRL, three consecutive years of forced socialising and training, I find it not only extremely hard to not find any group that is willing to TALK to me it's basically virtually impossible. Even when I succeed at creating small talks it eventually leads to nothing.. I'm going to hit my late twenties with none that I consider remotely close. Soon I'll embrace this NEET life and live fully as an embodiment of a social failure and I'll always hate normal people for it.

>>43800 talking is sharing information, if you have none to share why talk in the first place ? find a topic and put work on it, then people with same interests will be attracted to you. It is that simple.

>I'm fuarrrked up and it's all everybody else's fault Idiocy. No wonder you don't have any friends.

>>43807 i doubt it, enjoy diversity.

When was the last time you even heard of anyone who wasnt a teenager or 20 something college student actually have friends?

>>43803 >anon answers the question >UHM...... URE BLACK! No wonder why you're unlikeable lol

>ur black >no ur black idk whats going on but I think we're back

>>43800 You need to have a shared goal of some kind. You can't "just socialize".

>>43827 don't think OP and avatar user are the same person but yeah it's interesting how a lot of posters seem sane and sympathetic and then suddenly "nigger nigger nigger"

If you just carry on making small talk with the same people, they'll open up to you more and eventually you'll be brought into the fold. That's just how friend groups work.

Who you are matters more than what you do. Conversations are just mindless filler in-between implicit social transactions. People mainly want to associate with people that have looks, money, social status, that can get them things that they want. You're basically playing the wrong game, thinking that you have to be an interesting conversationalist, when in reality, the people you approach look at you up and down and immediately know that you are low on the totem pole and have nothing to offer them. Can you get them into some exclusive club? Can you get them drugs or "know a guy"? Are you simply hot and fuarrrkable? Probably not. You have to ask yourself, why do you want to make friends? You should be asking yourself what do you want and what you can give in exchange. If you're chronically lonely, it's probably because you invested in all the wrong things that your peers don't give a soykaf about. Oh lain, you know so much about cyber security, what's the best browser for privacy? Can you imagine a normal user saying that?

>>48300 The hardest parts of socializing and relationships is to control your investments levels within yourself + find people interested in your investments, but not for you, but for the investments you have made for yourself. Philosophy teaches us that basically our life purpose is to build something, create something, make this better for ourselves/others. If you're not doing that, then all turns into nothing matters and depression. Knowing this, relationships and friendships aren't going to satisfy your deeper meaning besides the most basic primal feelings for connections. The only way to truly satisfy your heart is to live by your truth. Invest in projects, topics, essays, ideas, and activities that you want to talk about. Build into your lifestyle. Write about it. Talk about it. Find social environments with people who are also interested in similar things. Besides that, just keep talking to people and continue getting rejected until you find someone you click with. It only takes one.

>>43841 So I'm basically fuarrrked? I thought friends and social relations were more based on interests and connections to one another, no I'm not hot I'm a disgusting freak and the only thing I invested my time in aside from animu and looking at a static Japanese drawings talking with a txt box is English literature.

>>43844 I think perhaps the other poster paints a picture that's a bit too bleak. It's true that people judge others based on material benefits and status markers, but that's only part of how they ultimately respond and create bonds. The big precursors of friendship seem to be shared activity (of a sort that requires multiple participants or is reliably more fun with the same) and frequent opportunity for interaction with the same people. If you have that squared away and it still seems like people aren't clicking with you, it gets tricky to diagnose the issue. Maybe you're going after the wrong segments of the population (birds of a feather flock together, so think about where to find the most promising flocks for your, uh...feather type?). Maybe it's a personal presentation issue. Maybe it's bad luck. Why don't you give the thread a little (or a lot, hey, we won't judge amirite Lains) information about what specifically you've tried doing with people and how it went? Be specific. (I would think that having an interest in literature would be a point in your favor, BTW) Also, if you're looking for advice on friendship from lainons I think you're making an obvious sort of mistake. Advice reflects the traits and experiences of those who give it. This is a site for the alienated and socially challenged.

>>43841 This is closest thing to a primordial evolutionary truth you can get. Sociology and psychology can be extrapolated from evolutionary psychology, even though it is pseudoscience that cant be tested we still can have that point of view. "Friends" exist out of necessity for survival. We hunt, we gather, we protect. Therefore we have to trust each other to do so. Today we don't really NEED friends, most of them are a burden or hindrance. This is why evolutionary impulse is there, but its incompatible with current socioeconomic situation. Best you can get is a temporary social tool, power of leverage of information and resources, for some specific goal. Just like that anon said, tools of purposeful connection. Similar stuff happened with dogs. We bred them for hunting. Now we use them for soothing our anxieties. Just like friends...

>>43844 You were duped by a system that breeds slave like people. This is why everything civilization has to offer is in a cute colored bubblewrap. Do everything the opposite of what appeal to authority and appeal to consensus tells you to do. Realize that death is part of life, and that running away from it won't help you achieve a purposeful life. Realize all slavery comes out of fear of death or afterlife. Life is meant to be enjoyed not feared. Create rules on your own observations and don't take other words as a given. Nobody has your interests in mind more than you. Not your doctor, not your accountant, not your politician.

>>43844 What kind of disgusting are we talking about here? Congenitally deformed? Don't bathe? Literature's cool - are you able to talk about it coherently?

>>43855 >Today we don't really NEED friends, most of them are a burden or hindrance. Connections will never go out of style because as long as society exists there is a benefit forming an ingroup that gives each other preferential treatment to win against competition. Frankly i think westerners are idiots who suffer for eating propaganda "individualism good nepotism bad". You hire outsiders to be "fair" while they still employ their own family&friends first while your guys have to run around begging for job with a resume. Its the honest kid naive enough to play fair on a cheating table. End result is you lose.

>>43841 >Can you imagine a normal user saying that? Why would you want to be friends with a normal user? You can be friends with the weird freaks. That's the only way that has ever worked for me.

>>43856 Imagine trusting people's opinions based on their body shape. No wonder "people" keep falling for grifters.

>>43841 >Who you are matters more than what you do. Its actually: The things that you do and the way that you do them is a core part of who you are. Stop investing in hollow baseless relationships which stem from a yearning to placate and console yourself because the desire for true bonding will never be found from this even when it succeeds. The world is full of people faking intimacy when in reality the majority of relationships have become entirely transactional. Avoid these types of people and do not allow yourself to become one. Only work with the real ones.

>>43860 Academics get caught lying so why would you trust them above a gymbro doing a selftest? The very first time an industry used academics to market their product with misleading science was bacon, since then its been the norm.

>>43863 You don't need to trust one over other. You can reject both. Trust facts over feelings. It's not eating 12 eggs that gives such a body but working hard in gym and keeping up your protein. Eggs isn't the only source for that.

>>43865 >working hard in gym or just work hard at home ? or if you want to work even harder , work on construction(gym) and use the money to buy even more protein? soy gym is for wanderlessly lambs. can you imagine being so idiotic you PAY to LIFT instead of LIFT to GET PAID? XD

>>43866 You're putting words in my mouth. I just used 'gym' because it's common and works. You can do whatever you want as long as it putting progressive overload on your muscles.

Friendships can be worthwhile and are easy to form. I've never had difficulty with that. What's hard is maintaining those relationships without feeling the desire to self-isolate and cut them off out of anxiety. I can understand that, I'd say stop trying so hard. Base your interaction with people around your own interests. You are clearly catastrophizing. There is no reason why you need to be a NEET, just because you have no friends. Honestly, it's so melodramatic and whiny. You are not the "embodiment of social failure", even if it allows you to overlook your own flaws by viewing yourself that way. You assume things are worse than they actually are so that you can justify not actually addressing the more moderate problems you might really have. Stop that.

>>43865 Dude the meme is about "eggs healthy???" not fitness. Fit bodybuilder simply provides evidence for a strict diet. Hes more believable to actually eat 12 eggs daily than some random fat fuarrrk who clearly doesnt give a soykaf about his diet.

>>43869 Like I said, both are wrong. You don't need 12 eggs daily to build a physique like that nor there is a need to abstain from eggs. You wouldn't trust a random tard on internet with abs over a fat doctor for medical advice, would you? Same logic applies here.

>>43863 >The very first time an industry used academics to market their product with misleading science was bacon, since then its been the norm. "Academics" misled the public with bacon how? And how would getting misled not consist of being an idiot with no critical thinking?

>>43863 the entirety of dietary science is academics misleading the public. I think this works principally through academics misleading themselves.

>>43871 Was something like they did a study "no breakfast at all vs eat bacon" with obvious result bacon better than going hungry. Then ran "Doctors say bacon is the best breakfast choice based on recent study results" for their advertisement. Reading that sentence implies experts said its better than any other food. That's the misleading part. They basically lie by omission abusing the trust in experts to sell their product.

>>43870 I wasn't refuting your point about fitness, i was trying to point at the posting behavior itself on topic of OP's question: you turned a "haha gymbro eats what science man says kills" joke into a fitness rant ignoring the original intention entirely. If you are OP then remove contrarian behavior for your goal making friends. People hang out with fun people not negative nannies. Running after people like their mom doesnt make you popular regardless if you are right.

>>43865 >It's not eating 12 eggs that gives such a body but working hard in gym and keeping up your protein. Eggs isn't the only source for that. Actually it is 99% genetics and steroids/hormones. the guy in the pic was one of the early "fake natties"

>>43844 >English literature Join a book club. Or just talk about books next time you're making small talk. Despite how often people complain that nobody reads books anymore, there are plenty of readers and you're bound to find one or two in any small group of people. Reading the popular classics helps, but telling someone niche stuff from an obscure book is also a good way to get a conversation going in my experience. People like to take it as an opportunity to share whatever obscure book they last enjoyed was. anime is sort of the same. most people in a group won't care but the ones who do will be happy to find someone to talk about it with. as long as you're not weird about. anime is probably even better than literature because then you can invite people over for watch parties. >>43847 is 110% correct. Activities are more important than common interests. And you need to share more of you want more constructive help. >>43841 op is in his late twenties so I don't think he really needs to worry about getting people into clubs or too much about social status. At that age and older, plenty of people just want other people who are pleasant to kill time with. but the drugs part is still true at any age. >Oh lain, you know so much about cyber security, what's the best browser for privacy? Can you imagine a normal user saying that? A few normal users have asked me about browser privacy and even more have asked about more general computer privacy, cryptography, and security. If you're excited about a topic and personable when you talk about it, people will remember and think of you whenever it comes up in their life

>>43841 >uhhhh yeah hobbies make u a fuarrrking nerd just do drugs to get friends lmao Typical incel trying to """""""""""""""""""improve""""""""""""""""""" the life of others with """""""""""""""""""blackpill""""""""""""""""""" advice that's only meant to demoralize. Lainon just live a healthy life, don't drop the hobbies that you find fun at the cost of getting friends, don't listen to looksf4gs and go to social events, go to the gym now and then, make a proper schedule and you'll at least find someone to go for drinks with every now and then, incels just like to exaggerate it to the absolute maximum to try and reason their unsuccessful life Take a look at Elliot Rodger (ER) for example, he was a handsome man with a rich family who could've easily seduced a girl if he worked on his social skills and wasn't filled to the brim with hate, you could say that he was unsuccessful due to his Aspergers diagnosis (incels call that a mentalcel, and most incels hate that word since they believe that it's only a matter of looks) but even his parents said that his case was a high functioning one, and something that he could've worked on to better his social skills. You can also go to wizchan, which is an, I quote from the incels wiki >A website focused on wizardry. It is the successor of Wizardchan. A 'wizard' in the incelosphere refers to a joke which describes how an adult male virgin transforms into a wizard with magical powers after age 30. From my limited experience there, they seem to be more peaceful that regular places in the "incelosphere" e.g incels.is or 4chan/soc/ so my purpose isn't to mock them but you can clearly see that most of these people suffer from extreme isolation, you could say that the isolation comes from the inceldom, and I'm not going to disagree on that entirely, but you also can't deny that those people would benefit at least a bit from a bit of social interaction, beit talking to the cashiers or going clubbing, any interaction is good interaction TL;DR: Incels/looksmax.org f4gs only seek to demoralize others, make up a schedule, put yourself in uncomfortable situations and you'll greatly improve

>>43880 >Take a look at Elliot Rodger (ER) for example, he was a handsome man lol

>>43880 females want to return to monkies.They are also trying to low the bar because thats the only way someone will give a fuarrrk about them. They and the lazy cowards that turn a blind eye to filth are the reason why the roman empire collapsed and we still rely on XX for reproducion.

>>43884 kinda getting sick of you tranny avatar user

Join your local YMCA and take some kind of exercise class like pool exercise or yoga. Not only will you be around people with a chance to make a friend, but you'll get a little more fit which will also help a lot with meeting people. And/or go to the park and hike, jog, or bike a trail. Either way, you'll be out around people without feeling pressured to be social, but still have the option to be social if you want to. Watch how other people do it, then try it yourself. Or just sit on a park bench and feed pigeons. They'll always be your friends :)

>>43880 >Take a look at Elliot Rodger (ER) for example, he was a handsome man with a rich family how much money did his broken family even have, between the failed actress mom and the noname director dad? Im not saying he was dirt poor or anything but he wasn't rich, and was ugly to boot. If he didn't kill himself he'd be drowning in girls in prison, might even have a few kids by now, no need for social skills. That was his big mistake imho, the final proof that he had no comprehension of the human mind. He also was just stupid in other ways but this isnt the supreme gentleman general so Ill leave it at that.

>>43880 A lot of people look legit fine and have a decent personality, it's just it's getting harder and harder to find/create healthy in real life social environments in modern society. Self improvement is just mental masturbation. Try to self improve too much and you won't be compatible with anyone.

>>43889 >A lot of people look legit fine and have a decent personality, it's just it's getting harder and harder to find/create healthy in real life social environments in modern society. Self improvement is just mental masturbation. Try to self improve too much and you won't be compatible with anyone. I don't think it is as hard as you make it out to be. Quoting Fight Club makes you seem like a jackass.