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Last night, my kid asked me if this is what I thought I'd being doing at 36, I didn't have the heart to tell him I never planned on living this long. But waking up today finding a hole in my air mattress, the constant anxiety of knowing I can't pay my rent this month, 8 digital dollars to my name and a car that doesn't have any gas in it the day before my 36th birthday is in fact not what I was expecting my mid30s to be like. I wish I could go back in time, I don't wanna do this anymore.

>fuarrrked up life >has kid This fills me with sadness, but not for the usual reason. It's not that I care about the kid, it's just that it reminds me that getting a girl won't magically fix everything, life will still suck. Maybe even more so. There really is no hope.

i couldnt even imagine having kids, so for that im jealous of you and cant relate. but i also feel sorry for you. wheres the mom? dont you have parents that can help you out? its really hard for me to determine if you have it better or worse than me, an almost 30 year old NEET with little work experience and no marketable skills. i would be so happy if i just had a member of the opposite sex to talk with, hang out, etc. but i dont. i dont think i ever will

>>41621 I don't think you can compare lives like that. To me, both your and the OP's situations seem sad.

>>41617 finding a partner is definitely something that can fuarrrk things up even more, I was in a toxic and abusive marriage for 10 years before I finally got out. However when I left I was left with nothing, so now here I am about to enter the tail end of 30 with 5 bucks to my name, a truck that don't run atm and still trying to be a decent parent. My only hope is that I wont fuarrrk it up for the kid and that somehow the future for their generation doesn't get much worse than It's already looking.

>>41621 >>41621 left the mom a few months ago, was sick of being abused to the point that I just wanted to end it all constantly. I mean I have a roof over my head atm but my folks don't have to money to support me they are trying to retire but their fuarrrk up kids like myself are keeping them back. idk I mean it's not about whos situation is worse, soykaf is like kicking dead whales down the beach and can is like kicking dead whales down the beach for multiple reasons but I'm not going to be able to make rent on time for July so who knows, might be on the street by the end of the month. I know I'm just rambling but if you take away anything from this let it be one thing. Other people can never be your solution, no matter how lonely or isolated you feel, looking to someone else to fix that will never work long term.

Sorry to hear you going through it OP. I assume you have a full time job and are working all you can to improve things. Unfortunately you don't have much choice besides pushing through. Your kid depends on you to keep things together, and as long as you keep trying then you're doing right by him/her.

>>41627 Only part time which is a whole other issue/can of worms over how I lost what I thought was going to be my forever career not long after leaving my abusive ex. I know I don't have a choice, it is what it is and I have to do what I can to make sure I can provide a safe place for the kiddo. Basically the kid's the only reason I haven't done myself in or ran off into the wind and let the universe decide what to do with me. Just past midnight for me, guess that's another cycle completed by my physical form. *puts on party hat*

>>41628 If you had a career previously is it not possible to back into that same field? Seems like your best move is to find full time work or another part time job.

>>41628 honestly if i were in your situation, considering the future prospect of life of your kid in this society i would seriously consider moving to the country. People in churches will take care of you in one way or another, i can guarantee it as someone that was born in an ambient like that. Try not to go with prejudices and just be part of the community and shake hands and someone will get you a job just for the fact that you have a kid. Things are very pragmatic in the country. Then you can buy some cheap land and live there and eventually your kid will thank you for having such an heritage. If you stay in the city you will just lose money on rent and your kid will probably live a soykafty life at school and after that. You don't even have to move seriously at first, just rent some place for a week and go to local events and churches and see how it goes. Hope you make it

>>41629 That's the plan, and I do still work in the field it's just a matter of finding somewhere that pays well and that actually had room for upward movement. I'm a custodian and used to work for a bigger school district in my area so it's a matter of finding something that can compare to that. Although I think they are trying to black list me because I had beef with higher ups that ended up leading to my eventual departure.

>>41631 I've thought about this a good deal, I have an very close friend that lives about 2 hours out of the metro area that I'm located in and the cost of living is significantly lower there. Part of the reasons I haven't is lack of a solid job market up there, although I'm sure I can still find work even as a custodian, and the other big one is being 2 hours away from my kid. Right now I'm about a 1o minute drive and what support network I do have is all down where I am. There is also the issue of actually acquiring the fund to uproot what life I do have and move. However this is starting to look like the option that could be the most conducive to prosperity, the only other thing atm is going back to school. I'm all registered to start this fall so I'm really waiting on that goobermint scrip as a safety net, just gotta hope it comes before I get kicked out, debt be damned.

>>41631 >hurr durr da country dis da country dat >t. never stepped foot in the country for more than 5 seconds

>>41611 His economic situation is bad because he lacks education and skills that allow him to earn money. Since even if you stop spending so much money on stupid things, you will always be condemned to mediocre and poorly paid jobs, so the best thing you can do is go to a trade school, and learn something in demand, or if you already have a halfway career I am going to finish it no matter what, regardless of the sacrifice I have to make. >>41640 The field is a lot of work, and a lot of risk in general. There are much more profitable things to do, and even if you look at it from the social side, the field is not exempt from degeneration, since sadly drugs, alcohol, and the internet reach everywhere.

>>41617 >>41611 >>41621 I hate glitterboys like you who just have a kid because you think it'll make your life happier. You are supposed to provide them with a healthy, normal lifestyle but instead you'll make your kid just as soykafty as you are.

>>44376 IDK personally I am glad that my parents gave me life. They could have been better, I really wish they had, but at the same time I owe them literally everything, every spot of happiness, every opportunity, everything I have ever done is ultimately their work and their gift to me. They didn't have to make me, I owe them everything, and I will never be able to pay them back.

>>44376 >I hate glitterboys like you who just have a kid because you think it'll make your life happier. You are supposed to provide them with a healthy, normal lifestyle but instead you'll make your kid just as soykafty as you are. I can't tell if this is bait or not. You don't even know lainons life situation and you hate him only because he has both a kid and a soykafty life

>>41640 >>41688 Country living isn't the worst. It doesn't even need to be in the fields. There are plenty of small town businesses that need all kinds of workers, and people who just need general help. The problem is the boredom when nothing is going on and unless people, especially children have hobbies, they will turn to drugs to kill the time.

White people are so oppressed today....