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Does your body do some weird involuntarily actions? For some reason I can't cry when other people are crying next to me, it's not that I don't want to cry when other people are around it's just that my body forces me to not do it while other people are sad/crying in the same room as I am.

I can't get sad instantaneous after something bad happen, I gradually start to feel bad, most of the times one day after something happen.

>>15450 If you're in a sad situation and instead of being in the moment you're looking around at others and what they're doing and why you're not doing the same, then you are the reason for your emotional disconnect.

>>15455 I AM in the moment and I still feel bad when I'm in a sad situation, the problem is that I can not cry while there are other people crying are in the same room as me.

>>15456 Yes. The reason for that is because you are focused on other people and what they're doing. The reason you're able to focus this hard on others is because you're disconnected from your own context when all this is going on. You're not in the moment.

I laugh and talk to myself sometimes, I do this more often to combat my loneliness and sorrow that I have. I sometimes question whether I will be able to stop this, it makes me look absolutely insane. I also have to have something in my hand, whether it's a pen or a toy ... I am so childish sometimes

>>15461 How crazy do you look if you mutter? Like you're shopping and you make an expression of doubt and mutter >nah this isn't good, I'll take this one instead I hate subconsciously worrying so much about people's opinion of me. After I do or say anything in public I stress to no end about my speech and body language.

>>15471 I don't think you understand, it's just mutter, it's me literally walking and talking to myself in the streets. But I mostly do it when i'm alone or when it's an empty street, it just feels ... relaxing and comfy

>>15473 My room mate mutters and hums all the time. I like talking out loud and singing too. But it's kinda creepy when he does it. I don't know if it's anxiety or just something he always does.

>>15474 It's mostly a bad habit, you can tell a lot about someone actually when they do that. It's not a sign of insanity but more of loneliness and unawareness, is he a bit childish or lost minded?

>>15477 Yes. And very allof and in to wierd stuff i think. Maybe also some kind of techie wizard.

>>15479 Trust me, he's not a tech wizzie, just a sore loser like myself I assume, I personally could be a good friend to him since I relate a lot. And to guess the stuff he's into it might something hardcore like lolicons, hacking stuff, autist rants about the world and things that are happening when no one cares yea bud, get away from him and tell him to stop it, not a lot of us are told to stop talking to ourselves people just assume that we're crazy

>>15481 >>15477 A lot of people pick it up as they get older, particularly if they are alone most of the time. I do it now, didn't used to when I was younger.

>>15481 I could probably be friends with him and sperg about soldering circuits and stuff but he never hardly talks at all and i'm trying to distance myself from my own bad habits. We share a couple similarities at least but may be one of those things where you hate each other or something.

When i get socially concious sometimes my mouth can start to feel like the muscles are stressed and it might get kind of twitchy or something. What's that all about. I feel like i'm grimacing but pretty sure i'm straightfaced.

People probably dont notice but i tend to have do odd head movements sometimes and i tend to clench my fists pretty hard sometimes and/or do other things of that sort like grip my arms real hard. Its almost self abuse of some sort, as long as nobody brings it up i dont care.

>>15489 >May be one of those things where you hate each other or something Explain

>>15487 And you get judged for it I bet

>>15495 Not by anyone of consequence.

>>15493 Sometimes personalities just don't mix. Even if you have similar interests. The only things he has said to me that weren't gibberish were kind of insulting. I feel like even if i was nice to him he wouldn't like me. I've had a lot of people hate me because i blurt out dumb stuff. Not so much anymore but still. Isn't eccentric people with similar interests hating each other kind of a common thing?

>>15498 >The only things he has said to me that weren't gibberish were kind of insulting People have accused me of that, give him the benefit of the doubt, he's not trying to be mean, it's just how he is try talking to him even if what he said hurts you

Yes but nothing interesting, just silly faces when asking questions or letting my arm fall after I point something Bit embarrassing that

the one and only thing i will hate about myself is my smile. i don't know how it happened but i force myself to smile when talking to other people. i fuarrrking hate it and wish it would stop. i don't feel happy and i don't feel sad. if there was a way i could stop it then i would do it in a heartbeat. i just feel like a creep because i know i feel nothing talking to the other person yet they probably think i'm happy to talk to them. fuarrrking not.

>>15456 Im not the samd lanion and this is 9 months later but I just discovered this thread and I feel like this really applies to some situations I've been in, ty anon I'll do my best to live on my moment now that I understand thats the reason <3