Need unbiased romantic advice

The situation: John had been in a distance relationship with Jane for two months. One day, Jane started to behave strangely, taking too long to reply / seemingly distant. After a few days, John, being the impulsive dick that he is, decided it would be a good idea to confront Jane on the matter, and Jane appeared to be indifferent over text. John proceeded to say that he wouldn't want things to go on like this, and he suddenly broke up with Jane because she seemed to not care. John regretted this, apologized the next day to Jane, but the damage was already done and there was no going back. A week later, after recollecting his thoughts, John has decided to message Jane once more to try and fix this mess. What do you guys think? Is it a futile attempt for John to pursue this any further? John truly deeply loved and still loves Jane, but as it is it seems that it's no longer reciprocal, and his impulsive behaviour accelerated the inevitable (?) breakup. John feels very depressed and out of energy every time he remembers what he has lost. What should he do now?

>>75444 >distance relationship >for two months Long distance relationships are hard, but I am not sure I would consider two month long "relationship" anything serious. What was their long term plan, anyway? Just sharing messages every night and visit every few weeks? Surely that's not viable strategy for long term relationship. It would have break down sooner or later. >but the damage was already done and there was no going back. What does that actually means? This might mean "I am kinda angry at you" or "Fuarrk off and never contact me again or I am calling police!". >Is it a futile attempt for John to pursue this any further? Very likely, but he might want to check anyway, just in case. Better not to spend too much time on this, though. For the sake of both of them. >What should he do now? Probably get over it.

>>75444 John should limit his attention to the 30 mile radius surrounding him and forget anything else exists.

>>75444 It's not futile, but if she rejects you again, you should leave it be and move on. It's okay to try to reconcile a week after a breakup, but there's no point to try multiple times after that. Also, it would be creepy and annoying if you keep trying. >taking too long to reply / seemingly distant There are a million reasons why someone could be like this and most of them have nothing to do with you. How did you confront her? It's okay to say "you seem distant, is everything ok?" It's not okay to say "you're not talking to me enough today so I'm breaking up with you." >John proceeded to say that he wouldn't want things to go on like this, and he suddenly broke up with Jane because she seemed to not care. You have probably realized this since then, but just in case it needs to be said: in any relationship, the level of interest your partner will have in you fluctuates. There will be days where you or your partner are less interested in the other or just less available. There are days when they will not have the energy to be affectionate or engaging. There are days when other soykaf is happening in their life that is more important than talking to you. It's very rarely permanent and instead of freaking out and breaking up over it, you need to be content with giving them space. If you're not emotionally mature enough to accept that, then you're not mature enough to have a long-term partner.

>>75444 Jane is fuarrrking Jack, Joe, maybe even a Jill and John should have realized this.

>distance relationship doomed from the start. The only people that can make it work are people who have already been physically together for multiple years, visit regularly for large chunks of time, and have an understanding that the distance is temporary.

>>75444 Move on. Bering needy towards others is extremely unattractive. The more you try to fix it the more you will break it. Just match the investment put on by the other person next time.

move on, such relationships are simply food for your survivalist mind to consume.

>>75446 Yes, and eventually the plan was work towards moving together in the future. John confronted her about it, and proceeded to saying that it wouldnt work if it was like that. She said that was ok (more or less, language aside), so John without thinking much said that it's over then. John got ghosted and has given up. He's not ok. >>75456 The thing is that she used to be, as well.. then one day she changed. John waited for a week before confronting her, it wasn't a single day thing.. John thinks something was up but now he will never know. >>75449

>>75460 John also feels that he got way too invested into the relationship. It was serious despite very short. He has no clue on what he should do to move on anymore, everything is just so gray.

>>75461 >He has no clue on what he should do to move on anymore, everything is just so gray. First major break up? Most people feel like that. Start a new hobby or rediscover an old one to keep you distracted for the next couple weeks. You'll feel back to normal sooner than you think.

>>75462 Yeah. The funny part is that he had a considerably longer (few years) relationship and it didn't feel nearly as bad. Looking into it right now, thanks.

>>75461 John should stop being a glitterboy and move on and not speak in the third person to minimize his glitterboyry

>>75464 It is John's opinion that you are the glitterboy here. John has decided that he will find some chick somewhere to just have a chat to try and forget his intense experience, zero expectations this time. Any tips?

fuarrrking holy soykaf i would kiss the god right in his ass if this kind of "problem" was my source of depression. honestly it is so mind blowing to read how people obsess about failed worthless relationships when you are one step from literal death looking for void to come and decide your fate. i'm not accusing anyone, so don't get butthurt, i just feel like i need to say this aloud because really, it feels so strange and petty to me. like i live in a parallel universe

bruddha stop trying to be all refined with your situation you already made it unobjective when you started whining all about the messes and whatever, shes just another girl and in the eyes of a large reptile shes just a another snack so stop caring and if ya could do it once then certainly you can find a girl thats also wanting a relationship with u. and anyways what were you going to do with the relationship anyways? its the same as any other internet bullshit just get a move on dude

>>75444 Jane began treating John like soykaf to passively manipulate him to break up with her so she wouldn't feel guilty about it, for she had begun dating someone else beforehand. Had John not done this he would have been ghosted. Jane is a cheater, and a coward who cannot be alone, nor treat her lovers with respect because it's all about her. John needs to move on. If Jane's new love doesn't work out John may someday get a message from her out of the blue. He may be tempted to resume courting Jane. That would be a huge mistake for him. John will eventually find someone who loves him for who he is, not for what he can do for Jane, but only if he lets Jane go. John is a nice person who is capable of loving someone and he will be all right.