How to live

Just getting something off my chest, but I think that niche imageboard users are a very specific demographic, maybe you’ve had similar moments. Growing up I tended to idolize things. I thought people were smarter and nicer than they really were and later got disappointed. But even then I’ve had vague idealized ideas about love, politics, science etc and that kept me going. Right now I’m 22, I’ve finished therapy, managed to deal with my traumatic childhood, landed some entry level IT job with nice working conditions. I live alone and support myself. But I don’t really have any motivation to do anything. I keep learning new things and have long term plans but only because it seems like the rational thing to do. I even dabble with art. But I’m not committed to anything, I force myself. I’ve been in relationships, fell in love, thought that person is the one, got hurt, got over it. And later saw it all repeat itself. Love is just a game with high risk and high reward, nothing to live for. Studying is nice but science doesn’t have any miraculous solutions for world’s problems, it doesn’t have an end goal. Politics is just bigger and smaller echo chambers. The left is full of hypocrites fighting with made up enemies, the right is inhumane and that disgusts me. There’s no discussion and nothing seems to change. It feels like life just doesn’t offer what I need from it. I can’t let go of youthful idealism and nothing else seems to satisfy me. I want to change the world for the better and I think it’s a silly unpractical idea but I can’t let go of it.

I feel you. I'm tired so I won't write a lengthy reply, but I've been where you are now, and these are some things that have helped me. >meditation (neti neti) >lifting/calisthenics/walking >philosophy: stoicism and the existentialists, also nietzsche, spinoza, schopenhauer >good diet and intermittent fasting to keep your mind clear >a great, noble goal to strive for, eg. making the world a better place, creating beautiful art, taking care of animals/nature >engaging in cognitively challenging tasks like reading complex books, listening to complex debates etc. Life is a dream. Try to enjoy it.

Welcome to the world, OP. As for "wanting to change the world for the better", well, it's only natural. But no matter what you do or how much you manage to achieve in bringing the change you believe to want for this world, things will never endup the way you want them to and people willalways find the way to make the worst out of your best efforts. It's human nature. Cheers.

>>62977 >no matter what you do or how much you manage to achieve in bringing the change you believe to want for this world, things will never endup the way you want them to and people willalways find the way to make the worst out of your best efforts. Not really.

I personally go through phases, I will be hyper motivated and will push for my dreams, then I'll have a week of just lounging around being a turbo degen thinking nothing matters. I keep thinking that if I keep this cycle up I'll never get anywhere in my life and I'll just be doomed to be a failure. You shouldn't let go of youthful idealism though, at least not entirely. You can change the world by the way, it just takes so much effort that only a few people are able to do it in any given century. And if you had to second guess yourself on wanting to change the world, that probably means you're not one of those people. But that's fine, the best a normal person like you and me can accomplish is making the world better in the ways that you can actually reach. And that's hard enough as is. But keep your idealism and keep your goals high, but don't beat yourself up if you're not able to meet them. Just trying at all is better than most.