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I often find myself wasting time, whether it be playing video games or just staring at YouTube for hours. the time I spend on these seems so valuable spent elsewhere but I cant get myself to "learn piano" or "learn FORTRAN" like I probably should. I have interests like east Asian history and Math but I just can't bring myself to pursue those deeper under the force of my own will. I want to grow, I want to be strong and smart, I know how too but I just cant get myself to keep going once I've started Inevitably I will find myself wasting time, at the moment of realization a wash of dread moves over me, I'm afraid of the very thing I continue to endorse, but I still continue to do it. I wanted to know other lainanons experiences with this

I had this problem too, but then I went to college and for whatever reason it went away. Perhaps that will work for you. (Came back to some degree after I graduated though)

>>>50681 >I often find myself wasting time, whether it be playing video games or just staring at YouTube for hours. It seems as if I become just like you OP when I have too much time on my hands, and a severe deficit of social interaction, which has been almost impossible to avoid being a young man living all on his own during these "lockdowns". I crave social interaction, so I am driven to waste hours listening to streams, or reading forums, which has ruined my sleep and mental health. They aid the severe social deficit that I am experiencing right now, at the cost of massive amounts of time, not actually satisfying me all too much, and ruined self esteem. They've turned me into a weirdo who replaces real life connections with media, who is an annoying creep to be around when I do interact, and who has no real drive to live life. >the time I spend on these seems so valuable spent elsewhere but I cant get myself to "learn piano" or "learn FORTRAN" like I probably should. Do not force yourself to do piano or Fortran at the moment. Several things need come first, like having healthy sleep, daily in-person socializing, a healthy body, a healthy diet, and a meaningful motivation to actually accomplish something in piano or Fortran. These are also all things that need to be worked on little by little, and cannot be fixed within a few days or a few weeks. "Meaningful motivation" is a motivation to learn (or act in general) founded on positive emotions, like wonder, curiosity, love, etc. The obverse, motivation based on negative emotions, like envy, attention seeking, "I should do this", anger, indignation, jealousy, sadism, etc, will lead you nowhere, and will ruin everything that you ever try, you will hate the studying and practice too, and become depressed/anxious after you've reached your end goal.

i feel you OP. i keep wasting my time day by day. > Several things need come first, like having healthy sleep, daily in-person socializing, a healthy body, a healthy diet, and a meaningful motivation i am going to try this lainon while i lurk on the other thread >>28166

>>50681 I know this filling. However, I am solving this problem. I found that my closest circle of people forced me to do that useless staff so I have left social networks and messagers and reduced contacts with that 'bad' people. It freed a lot of time which I spent on activities like education and contests. I also made a timetable and began to go to bed and to look after myself. All the means are need to make your brain busy every moment and to except worthless social influence. Moreover, you are set up on what you consume so it's time to change the type of media you watch. That helps me. Good luck to you.

>>50682 Op here am currently a civil engineering major. (I'm really using the nuke minor to get into grad school for nukeE)

>>50684 Op here again i'm not necessarily craving social interaction. I only have 2 good friends whom i rarely spend time with +classmates and I already feelike I'm at my social limit, the videos I watch aren't usually social ones, they fall more in line with informative crap I run across. "How did the aincet Roman's cook bread" Your point of finding motives to move forward derived from honest intent is pretty good. Will try to find a good reason to motivate myself

>>50689 > the videos I watch aren't usually social ones, they fall more in line with informative crap I run across. "How did the aincet Roman's cook bread" That's not what I meant. I mean that instead of having a conversation about Romans making bread with your close friends, you choose to get that social stimulation of having someone talk to you through an Internet video. To get emotionally satisfied it takes much longer when I watch an Internet video, than when I have a meaningful conversation with someone who's mentally sound. I am driven to waste hours in podcasts when I am deprived of this instinct to connect, and maybe this is happening to you too, is what I meant.

You sound like me OP. The worst part of depression by far is sitting around getting older watching other people improve themselves and do cool things while you stay the same person struggling with the same problems accomplishing fuarrrk all. It pains me to think of all I could have accomplished if I had had the energy to put my mind to things from the beginning. I judge the hell out of people who waste their time pursuing dumb bs but I am no better using my time sitting around thinking about all I will do once I get my soykaf together. I want to try mushrooms or some type of psychedelics to try to fix myself, but I have no idea where to get them. I have had positive experiences with marijuana where it felt like I truly 'woke up' but to get to that point I would be too fried to do anything, and smoking daily made me suicidal. Those experiences made me realize how little I am in control of myself sober, it is like I am a spectator. The current strategy I am trying is denying myself small things strategically, like not watching a video that looks interesting or lying down instead of opening a game to try and build willpower. >>50684 >The obverse, motivation based on negative emotions, like envy, attention seeking, "I should do this", anger, indignation, jealousy, sadism, etc, will lead you nowhere, and will ruin everything that you ever try, you will hate the studying and practice too, and become depressed/anxious after you've reached your end goal. This is very true and something I need to keep in mind, thanks lainon

>>50760 regarding substance use, I wouldn't dance with that devil anon, while it may provide momentary clarity, i can say that every person I know who has done lsd/shroooms did not walk out any more enlightened in a meaningful way if you want to find some I would say ask the person who gave you pot, they probably have a network of people with access to that stuff somehow > like not watching a video that looks interesting or lying down instead of opening a game to try and build willpower. i like your idea of starting small and will give it a shot tonight

>>50681 I know how you feel. But I think that's not wasting. That's your daily life, and you feel boring about being repeated day. And I'm same as you too. I have a job and working there. But It's only for money what I keep my life. That can't be worthful things which can make me grow or stronger. You said like "nah I can't keep learning things 'cuz I'm lack of will." in >but I cant get myself to "learn piano" or "learn FORTRAN" like I probably should. I think those are interesting to you, temporarily. You just don't find your fundamental interest thing yet. But that temporary interest things are really helpful to find your goals 'cuz it's related of fundamental interest thing. I was interest in Philosophy and Abnormal Psychology. So I read many books and I finally find what I want is "Child Psychology; Child Psychiatry". I still read and learn about this. And I'm really happy to do. Btw, I don't have any idea to get a job or university about this. Cuz I don't think I have enough capability to help people. Anyway, Don't give up and fall in to depression. It's fed up words. But I wish you find your way to spend your time, not thinking about wasting it. Do everything what you are interested in. If you can't find, then find related things about it. And repeat. I wish you don't give up too fast and think "nah It's not really interested." like tree structures. I'm so sorry for my bad English.

>>50681 >I often find myself wasting time, >I want to grow, I want to be strong and smart, Start small and preferably do often. Make a schedule and a to-do list (otherwise you either forget to do something or you waste time thinking about what to do or you simply don't do the thing you should have/wanted to do) Ideally you want to do x for 30 min and have a 10-15 min break. A Mind For Numbers by Barbara Oakley is also a great book on learning, and you might find the Feynman Technique interesting as well.

>>50681 I have this problem to some extent, and I kinda know piano but am still not very good so def feel how it is to see a keyboard and get all ready to learn a song and then just mess around and not learn it. On the note of learning and stuff, this probably only works for some people and it a hot take for growing intellectually, but when I was really getting into philosophy/economics/linguistics I would use medium-size philosophy or politics servers to see where I could learn more. What I mean by this because just using discord without any goal in mind can turn you into a hermit: The point of them is to have cool people who you can learn from in some way. This is harder for things like history which the internet is full of politicised chuds with, but I met tons of philosophy students and graduates who were very helpful. Initially I knew nothing and would just ask people what they thought of smth, why they do, and you can learn about the concept through PDFs or, if you are very careful, youtube (and I mean like random channels of professors with a couple thousand views, never anything that shows up in recommends or front pages as its always full of soykaf). With learning more you can become more critical and logical and start to think for yourself more. You mentioned maths, within that same group I knew tons of mathematicians who had really interesting convos I wish I paid more attention to, but because of discord and stuff I now have surface-level knowledge of the history and implications of set and category theory and basic understanding of Poincare, Russell, and Whitehead for example. I recognise I don't have the broad overview someone with formal education in maths would have but now I have ledgings to grab onto when going into other fields of it. And to your most pressing point, why do this stuff and not get distracted? It's probably the hardest part, but you have to find some reason to have like ADHD-esque interest in those sorts of things. Learn something you find neat and then discuss it. I would often go onto the Stanford Encyclopedia of Philosophy for a particular issue and read it, and then try and defend one position of it with someone regardless of what I actually believed. Stuff like that helps you become a more reasonable person and builds intuition. If you find it hard to really get into something, I guess just keep pressing yourself as to why you like it. For every historical/philospohical/mathematical issue, there's a contemporary discussion of it which can provide some interesting viewpoints you didn't know existed. As for East Asian history, it's a bit sensationalised by gradeschool history but there is a fascinating debate over how necessary the nuclear weapons used in Hiroshima/Nagasaki were and you find that stuff like "well if the USA didn't nuke them, the Allies would of needed to invade them and cause so many deaths!" have way more nuance and complexity than assumed. It really helps you feel like a more knowledgeable person and I hope you can find some way to fuel an ADHD-esque quest for bettering yourself both intellectually and skillfully.

I waste a lot of time too, especially at work. But I always make room in my days to get a few hours of good bass practice, if my day wasn't filled with activities with loved ones. Only thing I can say as it's how I deal with it is to put yourself in a sitation where not doing sething leads to failure. Tell a family member or close friend you'll attempt learning a piano piece for them. Don't make it something above your skill pevel though. Doing things in your skill level is the only qay to get better. There's plenty of beautiful beginner etudes and songs. Autumn Leaves has one of the most beautiful melodies ever, and it's very simple. Some of the best music is simple.

Not OP but I have sort of an opposite problem. I'm prone to mania, meaning I'll throw myself into something for a few days, not sleep enough or take care of my body or maintain relationships, then sink into depression. Usually when I get like that I end up wasting even more time and energy than I would have otherwise. So I have to pace myself very carefully. >>50760 >I want to try mushrooms or some type of psychedelics to try to fix myself A lot of people seem to go in to it with this mindset. While the drugs can be therapeutic they often hinder more than help because of preconceived notions of the user about what the drug does and what it is for. I know a few people who wanted 'ego death' and ended up making fools of themselves. Ironically feeling enlightened is a sign of a big ego. I think this must be a thing among seasoned trippers, you start to feel like you couldn't possibly explain what you got out of it, and for novices all you can do is say "take more" because that's what you did and it worked out good for you. Adds a lot to the mystique, of course :)

>>51538 >I know a few people who wanted 'ego death' and ended up making fools of themselves Got any stories to tell? I'd like to hear more on how people with that kind of attitude ended up, because that was basically the attitude that I went with when I tried LSD for the first time. I think I got what I wanted from it - or should I say, "got what I was asking for"? -, but that's the thing with these substances: they can be so unpredictable.

Simple as this lainon. I speak from personal experience so trust me on this. First things first it's back to the basics. 1. You need to ensure proper nutrition and hydration. That means 3L of water a day, a variety of foods; bananas, green soykaf (lettuce, asparagus, broccoli), red soykaf (tomatoes, beetroot, apples). You have to ensure you're getting vitamin C which you cannot get from meat. Speaking of which, cut out processed meat it's not healthy and there are numerous studies indicating a correlation with cancers. Balance your meat intake: fish is good (mind the plastic: avoid ocean fish if you can, like salmon or tuna) beef is very nutrient rich, but expensive. If you're tight on cash get chicken. Once again avoiding processed soykaf - yes that means pre-packaged dishes. Learn to cook based.cooking is a good start. Notice how I'm not focusing on what not to eat? 2. Focus on something, anything. When you focus on what *not* to do, you box yourself into this state of constantly being aware of what you're not doing right. Instead, focus on what you should be doing. Make that the present. It's positive metal reinforcement; a la psycho-cybernetics. This is how you get bogged down in depression. You need to pave the way with autonomy. Which bring us to no. 3. 3. Goal setting. Goals are the quintessential part of self-help. Every morning, set yourself a list of goals. A minimum of 3 for each category; Body, Finance, Bucket List, Career, Relationship. Write them down, physically. Typing them in a .txt in ~ won't do you any good. Make it one of your goals to write down your goals EVERY morning if that helps. 4. The Morning Human sleep cycles range follow the Circadian rhythm. That means sun goes down, you go down, sun comes up, you get up. Adjust your sleep schedule to accommodate that. You need to be up either just before or at sunrise. This is the fundamental discipline building exercise. If as soon as you wake up you get out of bed, that discipline carrys you through the day. It'll take about a week of hell if your sleep cycle is really fuarrked to fix it so be prepared. You'll need to accommodate this new waking time with a bedtime to maintain a fixed minimum no. of hours of sleep. If you're young, <26 then get 9 hours of sleep, minimum. If your sleep patterns begin to gradually filter down to 8 or even 7, just accept that and utilize those extra hours to your benefit. I find I personally naturally gravitate to bi-phasic sleep. Once you've established a sleep pattern, try taking a siesta. (Sleep for a few hours at around 13:00.) You'll gain an acute alertness and a boost of energy into the evening. 5. Walk. As soon as you wake up. Walk. 15 minute walk, up the road and back. While you walk think about all the things you have to be grateful for. Observe nature, admire it. When you get back have breakfast and write down your goals. 6. Dig straight into it. This is the nitty gritty. You have your goals. You have direction. The next step is the hardest: action. By far, the best technique for coping with this is the Pomodoro technique. It breaks the idea of a task into bite-sized blocks of time, however if you have any other strategies, do use them. You're also free from distraction at this time of the morning, it's where the best work is done. I also suggest that you avoid all forms of media during this time. If you're going to study digitally: use an ebook. Don't get out your phone and start browsing memes or texting. Avoid human contact. Get the fuarrrk of IRC. This is your time and nobody elses. 7. Exercise Saw this one coming eh? "A healthy body, a healthy mind." It really rings true when you see results. You can turn that morning walk into a jog when your mind is in the right place. Start with just calisthenics; pushups, situps, squats etc. Great exercise is play the sally up sally down song and see how far you get. Set a goal to finish it :) Make sure to warm up, and stretch afterwards. Boof down a few boiled eggs (3-4) before you go to sleep. Eggs contain lots of casein protein which is a fast-acting muscle building protein to repair your body while your rest. When you're confident enough, go to gym and do your exercises there. Don't try and use gym equipment without a trainer or gym buddy. The gym community is full of really nice people, you'll find someone to be a gym buddy. 8. Abstinence. This is probably the most difficult one for most. If you're at the point of defending your habits you're too far gone. It all boils down to delaying gratification. The ultimate form of discipline is that of both the body and the mind. Either one left unchecked will be your vice. The sheer mental clarity you will receive, combined with the self-confidence from discipline will propel beyond your goals. 9. Read, a lot. Read books. Lots of them. Aim for a book a week, if you're reading 52 books in a year you're going to be way beyond anyone else in your age group. It takes about 50 books to have the equivalent knowledge of a degree. Reading helps you structure your thoughts, it gives you new insight and in my honest opinion is far easier to critically evaluate and analyze than videos or audio. I wish you my best regards lainon. I hope this helped. Some of my sources are attached if you want to read for yourself. Other: - How to Read: Better and Faster (Speed Reading, it's possible to read a book a day.) You can find this one on the Internet Archive - Structure and Interpretation of Computer Programs

>>51543 Good post. >Speed Reading Be careful. Read Mortimer Adler's book "How to Read a Book: The Classic Guide to Intelligent Reading". He basically argues that other books should be read faster, while some books require (or even deserve) a slower and more throughout/careful reading. He also defines multiple levels of reading. See ch. 2 re. levels of reading and pp.38 onward on reading speed ("it is true enough that many people read some things too slowly, and that they ought to read them faster. But many people also read some things too fast...") Also don't make marking/notes on the first time you read a section. You should recap the section when you make notes/marking/highlight stuff. Another book I recommend, is "A Mind for Numbers" by Barbara Oakley.