My sensitivity

Before getting through the subject, I want to talk a little bit about myself. I was raised 15 years by my convict father. My father and I had to go to our homeland so he could escape the authorities here in north America. I finally rejoined with the other half of my family late when I was 19 yo, then I started to get to know my mom and my brother. Here is a cut through my current situation. I am showing signs of PTSD throughout what happened during my childhood. I also noticed signs of autism, that I suspect I might be on the spectrum first of which are my hypersensitivity to noise. No I have not gone through medical treatment yet. When mom blames me for acting unconformed from the rest. It really puts a banner on my mouth and I find it hard and invalid to speak up when something is irritating me. For example my brother's smacking of the doors and his heel-walking which I can feel like he is stepping on my head. I am not blaming him for that. I am just expressing how hard it is for me to speak up when all I get is blamed or complains referring that I am acting up so intense. What are some advice to ease the tension and come up to my brother about my sensitivity, and not being a dick about it?

fuarrrk that! You deserve to have your needs addressed seriously. It is probably not what you are asking for, but in your situation, I would just take some pans and clang them together right by his ear, so he knows how it feels to you. But I know that that is not the right way to do it. You should first try to explain it using words, and try to see if they are trying to accommodate, and if they are, use positive reinforcement e.g. thanking them for it. I know it feels wrong to thank them for not making your life hell, but it is about pragmatics, it is about what works. Of course, if you are still not getting it good enough fast enough, you should remind them about your sensitivity, because maybe they forgot in that moment. However, definitely do more positive reinforcement, otherwise they might assume that you are trying to demand special privileges. If, on the other hand, they do not do anything to ameliorate your situation, you might try insisting. If they are really not understanding your sensitivity, you might try the demonstration I described in paragraph 1. Another thing about autism, is that some persons may feel like our natural way of speaking is rude, and they decide to be mean to us because they think we are being mean to them. That is something that really took me a long time to figure out, and I make sure that everybody knows that I am very direct in my manner of speaking, but it is not me being rude, but the way I speak. Also, I never mention my autism by name to anyone. It is better to describe the concrete things about me that they might need to know, such as my direct manner of speaking. Family can be difficult, because stereotypically you are stuck with your family. As though you can change friends but you cannot change family. Of course, that is true, but you have to remember that family is just genetic relationships. You should be able to be without your family if you don't want to be with them, but maybe where you are that is difficult.