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Around January of this year, I have been able to acquire roughly 4 packets of Piracetam drugs that I take every week or so, along with another box containing Noopept as an additional supplement and I have seen prolific improvements in regards to mental clarity, concentration, and a suppression to even removal of certain compulsions I have had for the past 5, going on 6 years now. I have Bipolar Disorder; a relatively ubiquitous mental disorder many people around the world have, or at least, that's what I have been proscribed to have. During these last 5 and 6 years, I have struggled immensely with very impulsive sexual desires to where I have spent money to obtain these transient sensations that for the longest, have costed me a great deal of my mental well being. My most recent example has been with a very regrettable sexual encounter with an escort and at a massage parlor, and even after I had shown a great desire to not indulge in those activities, I still find myself still attempting to do so again and again, which leads me to the next topic. During the time, around last year, where I had lost a copious amount of money. I had begun to feel very weird physical sensations throughout my body, like if there was something trying to warn me that things are not what they seem, coupled with psychotic breakdowns. One of the weird sensations I felt was a loss of feeling in my limbs, a very foul metallic/bitter taste in my mouth, and also with me feeling very "hot" at random intervals. So far, as of February of this year, I don't really feel that many of the weird sensations I have or really the desire to go and do the same things that brought me into financial and mental ruin. Yet I'm still morbidly curious, but also weary of what could've driven me to do the same things I have reminded myself not to do? Any input would help greatly and while I do feel somewhat suicidal, I have an intuitive feeling that there was something else going on than what I could see?

>>14855 >One of the weird sensations I felt was a loss of feeling in my limbs, a very foul metallic/bitter taste in my mouth, and also with me feeling very "hot" at random intervals. stroke? https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/12596521/ https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/27236454/ https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/28756557/ it seems like noopept is the more likely reason why stroke symptoms were reduced. this is all cursory research from wikipedia/duckduckgo, the pubmed links are from noopept and piracetam wikipedia article. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/N-Phenylacetyl-L-prolylglycine_ethyl_ester >It has been evaluated for neuroprotective effects in treating brain injuries and stroke get a blood test for vitamin levels too, just in case, and tell your psychiatrist you experienced stroke symptoms before taking the noots if you have one. this is a serious question too: are you menopausal or taking any sort of hormones. those things can contribute to hot flashes (which you seem to experience) and also increase stroke likelihood. I'm not sure where the risky or impulsive behavior factors in nor what the thread title means in this context. do you mean to imply that the risky behavior was sort of like an addiction to you?

>>14858 No, I have not taken any kind of hormonal medicine or am menopausal. As for your statement about the risky behaviors being addiction, it practically is for me and I have experienced lesser, but still very disconcerting impulsive episodes. Even now, when I try to actually gather the context as to what happened during these moments, it becomes very "hazy" to where it's like I'm almost not really there.

>>14855 I know the topic is nootropics but I have I heard that magic psilocybin mushrooms have helped a number of people to quit addictive substances like alcohol. > https://www.nytimes.com/2022/08/25/health/psilocybin-mushrooms-alcohol-addiction.html However, I don't know it magic mushrooms could help with your problems???

>>14870 I am open to experimenting with psychedelics, but as far as I'm aware, this seems to be an almost physical/neurological thing going on. For one thing, I'm glad I have slightly a bit more peace and rest in my body and clarity in my mind, but on the other hand, everything I do now feels meaningless.

try going on walks and eat your veggies

OP again. Hate to treat this as my personal blog, but I've kept a nearly 50k personal journal document on m desktop that lists my experiences. I've went back and read some of my entries, but from what I have recounted, it's like I'm dealing with some kind of stroke that happens at random interval as >>14858 said. I don't want to treat this as some attempt at gaining sympathy, as I am now in a slightly better place, but still anxious place. At the same in earnestness, what had occurred during last year has been the source of frequent, and very terrifying nightmares to where I have developed a great deal of apprehension over what was actually motivating me to do those things. I can't really go to my parents to try and understand this. They already think I'm kind of a pervert for being alone in my room and another previous incident to which I'll keep private about. Through my journal entries, I have started to develop very deep depersonalization episodes about the very nature of my identity and if I'm actually a human being. I'm so used to everything being chaotically capricious and bipolar that this newfound sense of clarity under this somewhat tense situation, has left me somewhat confused about my very meaning as a person.

>>14876 Ngl, I'm really curious about that other previous incident that made your parents think you're a pervert. Confessing your sins anonymously feels good and you haven't shared any identifying information. Besides, you couldn't possibly beat me at being a pervert than me: I only want to know your secret to sate my incest kink

>>14879 I had a previous incident where, to what memory I have of it, tried meeting with another escort. I'm having difficulty trying to find out what was going on in my mind in those "moments", but I remember somehow desperately searching for sex online and had been scammed by some e-floozy. Needless to say, I don't feel those same drives and urges anymore since I started taking nootropics, which makes me intrigued and afraid as to what was driving me to do that. Even then, I can't even really recall those moments in a clear way to know what I was thinking and why. It's almost like I'm watching a movie and all control over my life has been lost.